Saturday, October 14, 2006

fuck--my bike--miraculously found!!


the story...bike stolen anytime between 7:30pm-11:00pm wednesday night...at the time i was working at a teahouse...organizing the opening of a tea/alcohol bar...offering tea cocktails for the alcohol and tea aficianado...walk home angrier than i should have been...file police report...smoke....smoke...watch incredible hulk....er and Ingmar Bergman's Wild Strawberries...go to work at 3:00pm...get call from co-worker at 4:15...

"Jared, fuck, i think i just found yr bike...uuhhh, how do i know its yrs?"

"shit where are you?, shit, shit , uuuhhmm, chchcheck its fender, uhhm is it broken, yayaya its got a broken front fender, ya right at the fork, the fork, the fender its broken at the fork."

"ya, it is,"

"Hey lock that, fuck, shit, lock that up willya, shityashitya!! aaaarrrggghgghh!!!!"

Call the cops.. leave work met ummmhhh, my friend...the fuzz...they check my report bust out the cutters...my bike is frrreee...friend rescues desperate biker from months of hour-walk commutes each cold portl night!!

I say this calls for a celebratory reading:

Gertrude: from tender buttons:

Apple
Apple plum, carpet steak, seed clam, colored wine, calm seen, cold
green seen is called bake and change sweet is bready, a little piece a
little piece please.
A little piece please. Cane again to the presupposed and ready
eucalyptus tree, count out sherry and ripe plates and little corners
of a kind of ham. This is use.

5 comments:

John Sakkis said...

what dood.

Hayes said...

yeah..for real...stolen...found...cops..etc...justice...portl style...wooohooo!!

John Sakkis said...

i stole your bike. i'm in portland right now. sorry.

DUSIE said...

yeah!!! what´s up with the job, it sounds cool!

Hayes said...

could be cool...er..ummm...not quite yet...i bartend at the camellia lounge...its kinda like a mullet...tea business upfront...party bar in the back...however all of our house cocktails have either tea, or tea infused liquor, etc...one extravagance is called a haka...New Zealand Feijoa vodka, midori, tung ting oolong all over ice, soda and cream. Another one, more my style, is a plain old manhattan made with lapsang souchong infused bourbon.