I am not the gobbler. Turkeys have neckbeards. We make obsessive connections. The feathers look like oil in a parking lot, hinting at an entirely different somewhere over the rainbow. Turkeys travel in large groups, often covering the same several mile round track every day.
Driving through Audra State Park recently, a flock of turkeys was mistakenly referred to as "peacocks," but little did the enthusiast know, peacocks do not reside in the Appalachian mountains. The enthusiast has since become the butt of several jokes against common knowledge. However, the deer are abundant and running out of cover. Time to kill or be killed. Motorists beware. This year, the deer will have their revenge. Perhaps there we find the culprit behind the missing/found bike. The deer want us driving so they can attack. Two wheeled travel protects us and renders them defenseless.
Back to the drawing board.